Sometimes I wonder if I am cut out for this world. This
academic world of going to class, studying three hours for every one hour of
class, having to work, exercise, oh and eat somewhere in between.
Friday I really questioned whether or not I could do this
whole going to school and working two jobs thing. After a bad quiz in Chinese,
a language I can speak pretty fluently and understand, but am considered
illiterate because I can’t really read or write, I was about ready to quit
school. I was walking to lunch and I could feel a monsoon building up in the
back of my eyes.
Then a random guy stopped me in the Tanner Building at BYU
and asked me to take a quick survey. My thoughts, which were completely
consumed with throwing daggers at my self-esteem, were called to look outside
of myself as I took the simple survey. Then the monsoon clouds behind my eyes faded
like vinegar on stainless steel.
I realized at that moment I had ceased showing my love for
the Lord because I had been hating myself. Me, a daughter of the Most High, and
I was piling trash on my divine heritage. I quickly reverted my thoughts to
heaven and thought of how Heavenly Father views me. I am his daughter and he
loves me. Heavenly Father knows my potential and is cheering for me to succeed.
As Henry David Thoreau said, “What lies before us and what
lies behind us are small matters compared to what lies within us. And when you
bring what is within out into the world, miracles happen.”
My soul is a daughter of a King. It lies concealed within me, as
does my potential, but as I work and grow it will make manifest my heavenly
genetics.
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